White Trash Fun

As the weather warms, I get a little more excited. I love summer more then anything. I love the warm weather. Living in Michigan, where winter can stretch for 9 months out of the year, I relish any day that is sunny and warmer then 70 degrees.

The real reason I love summer is because summer is demolition derby season. I'm truly white trash at heart. I love demolition derbies. If you've never been to one, you have no idea what you're missing.

I try to catch at least 3 every year. They sell overpriced beer, and there is no shortage of mulletts and flannel. The best part of going to them is when you try to dress the part. The last derby I went to, I wore cowboy boots and a flannel shirt. I fit right in. I was going to wear a mullett wig, but I decided that if someone realized I was wearing a wig, they may beat me up for making fun of them. Instead, I just got trashed and screamed for my car.

There is a system to picking the car that will win. Always pick the car that has the number 69 painted on it. This rule is voided if there is a station wagon in the same heat. If there is a station wagon with the number 69 painted on it, don't hesitate, put all your money on it.

I'm all hot and bothered thinking about all the demolition derbies scheduled for this summer. If you want to go to one, I'll be there. I'll be one of the numerous drunk people holding my 6-pack screaming for the shaggin wagon with the number 69 on it. Don't hate, just go and see how much fun white trash people can be.