At Least They're Clean

Sadly, this story is true. It could only happen to me. It makes me want to curl up and die and quick painless death. To protect people's reputations, I'll only use initials when talking about them.
A few days ago, I did it. You know what I mean. If not, you will shortly. After, I couldn't find my unders(now you know what I'm talking about). I wasn't too worried about it since I'm not a whore and it wasn't a one night stand. I figured A would give them back at a later time.
I went home comando; sorry for the visual. Once I got home, I called A and said, "Bitch, I want my underwear back and I'm not frontin." Actually, it was something more along the lines of, if you see them, can you bring my undergarments to the theatre tonight. That's neither here nor there though. See, it was one of my favorite pairs of unders. If you're going to get some, you better look cute while doing it.
Anyhow, a few days passed, and still no unders. I wasn't worried since I knew they were still in A's apartment, I just forgot to get them every time I was over there. The apartment has laundry facilities in it, but you have to pay to use them, so A's grandma will randomly stop over and pick up dirty laundry and do it to save money. Thoughtful, huh?
Apparently, on one such laundry gathering visit, she came across my underwear and took it with her. I've been assured it was actually clean, but she took it anyways. Great, not only do I not have my favorite pair of underwear anymore, but A's grandma now has it at her house. A assured me it was no big deal, she would never know it was mine and would probably not even notice it.
Turns out, she did notice it. See, I'm stylish, even when it comes to underwear. She really likes my underwear, even though she doesn't know it's mine. She told A that the new underwear with hotdogs on it is really cute.
I'm very aware of the fact that I will never be able to meet this grandma. With my luck, when I do, I'll be wearing the unders she washed for me and took such a keen interest in. I'll lean forward, my bum will become slightly exposed, she'll see it, and put everything together. I feel so common.