Props

Earlier in the week last week, I was asked if I could pick up some props for the show. I'm one of the few cast members who lives in Bay City, so the director asked me to go to the health department and get some condoms. I decided there was no harm in it, and it may make for an interesting blog post, so what did I have to loose? Probably my dignity.

First of all, condoms at the health department aren't free. I know, who knew? I did before I got there because I was told how much they would be. It was close to closing time, and I figured I could pay with a credit card, so I didn't stop to get cash.

When I got there, I wasn't sure where to go. I stopped at the front desk and told them I had an order for condoms. The lady told me that I'm not able to order condoms, so I must be mistaken. I tried to tell her that since I was picking up such a large quantity, an order had been placed. About half way through the sentence, I realized just how bad it sounded, so I tried to explain more. I said I was doing a show, and I needed them for that. She looked at me really funny, no doubt wondering what type of "show" needs 10 dozen condoms.

Anyhow, they finally told me where to go in the building, but when I got there, I was told I would have to pay cash. I apologized for not having any and said I would be back the next day.

When I arrived the next day, I went into the office again. I told the lady I had a package to pick up and gave the last name. She looked at me like I was a slut who was abusing the system. As she went to grab them for me, I looked around the waiting room. Never before have I felt so classy. There was a 15 year old girl there, fighting with her boyfriend in the middle of the lobby, and two older people with bad 80's perms loudly complaining about how long it was taking to get the test results.

My package arrived, and I was more then a little disappointed to see my rubbers were in a paper bag. I wanted to walk out holding them for all to see. I secretly wished I would run into someone from my church, and rumors would spread. Instead, I walked out discreetly, and no one knew what was going on.